About Me

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I am mundane and magical, Silly and serious. I am an underachiever who suspects that someday in the eternities I may yet blossom and even fruit. I am a collector of spirits and essences, a studier of mood and nuance.I have many many faults and yet I've always been loved. I am a good friend, but I will let you go if you so desire. I believe in Somewhen. I laugh easily and cannot often cry, which I know is a Flaw. Like You, I am a work in progess.

Wednesday, June 21, 2017


I feel so sad and also kind of numb.

Today started with some wry humor, if you see such things as humorous. I was up at 4 to take Toby out and to bring my mom her juice. Then I went back to bed. But Toby's imperious "baHrk" got me up to take him out. I staggered to the bathroom (I'm not getting enough sleep. I don't think there IS enough sleep) and was greeted by a live mouse in the toilet bowl. I put that need on hold and went to take Toby. He peed on me (but not till we were through the sliding glass door)

My mom is being very brave. She says she wants things to continue here as usual. Of course, I don't think that's possible She has such a sweet, beautiful, innocent face. Last night, trying to impress on her the gravity of the situation I told her, than unless she opts for dialysis from what I've read, she will only live for weeks. She feels she's done what the Drs have asked and she doesn't quite understand how her situation could have gone so far down so fast. I don't either. We will have lots of questions for the Dr tomorrow. At this point I think I'd like to check into a home nurse. I'm betting she won't like that much, but I'm wondering if I am doing something wrong. I am trying my bestt to take good care of her and to balance that with her wishes.

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