I miss writing, I feel like I don't have enough time. Finding more time for things I really want to do is on my list of of priorities.

Things are going well here and that makes me happy. My mom and Bruce, who had never met prior to her moving in like each other. My dogs have not killed her dogs. The dogs are getting along pretty well. Max would like me to be his human, he gets jealous of PJ and sometimes acts on that. If he gets jealous of Jetty Lee she has convinced him to keep quiet about it.

My mom has been grateful and generous and she is not longer saying she wishes she would die every day. She seems healthier to me. We've established a primary care Dr and a nephrologist. I'll be taking her to an eye Dr next week. Her labs have improved a little but according to the Drs there is not a LOT of improvement in the cards. The best we can hope for is stability. She is happy and seems very clear mentally. I'm grateful.

We've formed a relationship with a lawyer and established a trust and a living will. He's helping us find a financial planner and that's been an interesting process. We have one more to listen to, but unless he is VERY impressive I think I know who we'll choose. My mom paid my student loans so I am within $600 of being debt free, unless I owe for taxes. Part of her money will be used to remodel and refurbish the house and we're starting with the yards. Bruce has been interviewing clean up crews (we will be taking out most of the trees and bushes. That's a pretty big job. He's talking to three more people tomorrow and by then I hope he will pick one. We're having a block wall put in to replace the old, rotting cedar fence. And then both yards will be landscaped. I'm envisioning a park-like back yard with lots of flowers. I think my mom will enjoy that, she really misses her humming birds. I'd enjoy it too and I will like spending time with her without her TV on. That thing is on 24 hours a day! But I am pleased that's she has started to turn out the light at night. She has been sleeping with a light on for years.

We have so much stuff to go through in the house that it will take a little time to get that into a workable position, but Bruce is also interviewing general contractors. He wants to get a feel for someone he feels can do a good job before explaining the extent of "the List" Probably we will start with replacing the roof which has been leaking due to bad installation of a HVAC unit. I'm sort of scared to see what the damage is there.I'm getting an estimate for solar panels and batteries.

We also have an infestation of mice and I know we are not the only ones on the block to have this problem. Bruce has become adept at catching them and I transport them to a far off field where they probably die. But we think it's time to call in professionals once we've gone through the excess of stuff so any holes can be blocked.

My mom teases me about my cooking. She is well satisfied with breakfasts but dinners are not always up to snuff. Part of this is because she only seems to want variations of hamburger. She won't eat chicken and doesn't much care for pork. Once in awhile she will eat fish. I was getting a wide variety of vegetables but she really just wants the mixed vegetables with corn and peas and carrots and green beans. She had a potassium problem and that has restricted man of her favorite foods. Bruce tells me I should force her to eat right. I'd be more inclined to do that to HIM. My mom is an adult and both she and I are aiming for quality of life over quantity. Hence, I've made some of her favorite foods even if she "shouldn't" eat them and she is pretty reasonable about not overdoing.

She doesn't go out very often but she has "lost power" a couple of times. I am pretty sure this is not a blood sugar problem since I make sure she eats well. It's likely a blood PRESSURE problem, but it could still kill her. She is very frank speaking about death but I'd like her to have some happy time. I got a transport wheelchair and I leave it in the trunk. She is not hep about using it but it makes me feel much better to have it if she becomes weak.

This entry is more like a laundry list than I wanted it to be. I thought I might focus more on spirit. I just finished a book called Dying To Be Me and it made a lot of sense to me. I will be revisiting those ideas and hoping to change my course to be more open to adventure and inspiration and authenticity and kindness.

I got back home to Utah Monday after being in CA since the day after Mother's Day. My mother now lives with us. What a challenging, humbling, empowering and surreal set of experiences THAT was! It was full of doctors, police, courts, lawyers, old friends as far back as high school, long lost relatives, day workers and Murder Dog and more! I have been exhausted for months, but things are definitely on the better side now. I just made (and unfortunately ate) some olive casserole and I made it so hot my nose is running and my breath actually feels fiery. This does not bode well for a good night's sleep, so, while I am way too tired to write much here I bet I won't get much sleep tonight. Bruce is teasing me because Max, one of my mom's 2 dogs which have been added to the family, is clearly auditioning to be my number one dog.
I just thought I'd see if I could log in here. I only took my phone. I don't think I will ever travel without my computer again!

My mom's car is back. My nephew apparently went to Olive Garden with his mom. He made MY mom, who supports him, mashed potatoes, corn and, she said, some kind of sausage.

I called my mom to wish her Happy Mother's Day and listening to her I was so frustrated with her and the things she needs to get done I said,"Why don't I just come down for a few days? Just to get some of these things you really need  done. Then I will go home. I promise. Wouldn't you like to gt some of this stuff taken care of?  I was surprised when she said, "I think I would. Will you stay at the Denny's? (I usually stay at a Best Western which has an adjacent Dennys) I said I sure could. I got off the phone with her telling her I'd call back and went to put some money in the bank. Looking at the Best Western I learned a 5 night stay would be $595, which I really didn't want to afford so I booked a Quality Inn for $450. Really I will just need to sleep and bathe there. Bruce can't understand why she doesn't want me to stay with her but I can. I called her back and told her I'd see her tomorrow. I asked her to think of all the things she needs done for now. I mentioned the lightbulb that went out in the stairway (I just HATE thinking of her on those stairs) My nephew hadn't changed it for at least 2 weeks so she ws going up and down in the dark. But she says he has replaced it now. So... the list of things I think are urgent are to get her to a doctor for a blood sugar test kit (she doesn't currently have one) get her to an audiologist for a hearing test and to order hearing aids, get her to a Dr for an eye exam and eye drops to control pressure in her eyes. Take her to see if we can't find a magnifying light that will allow her to actually read her mail, take her to get her taxes done (or go myself if she doesn't need to be there) take her car to get and oil change, an inspection and be registered I'm not sure what else she urgently needs but those things are a good start. I went to bed because I've been running very tired an don't have the energy to do anything tonight. In the morning I need to notify the few people scheduled for grooming appointments that I won't be here next week. I'll offer them free replacement appointments. I've already gotten gas. I need to lay in a few supplies for Bruce.I need to pack. Things are charging now. I was trying to get some decent sleep but the phone rang and it was my mom. She told me my nephew took her car. This is without permission. He doesn't even have a driver's license. She says the car has insurance but I don't know what her liability would be. She does allow him to drive it sometimes because she needs things so she does not want to report it stolen. I just wish she would get out of there. What remains of her life should not be like this. Her life should never have been like this. Anyway I am tied up in knots right now. I can only go down and see what I can do. And let her choose to stay or move as she wants.

My mom called this morning as I was grooming the day's first dog. She says she thinks she got a hearing aid (she did not explain why this was not a sure thing, but I am very curious. She says she went to the Dr and was given something for excessive wax in her ears. Really glad it's not an infection and hopefully it will solve her hearing problem. She said the visit was a check up. I am wondering what they said about her cough. I tried to call her after I was done with all the dogs but she is not answering. Hopefully I can get her tomorrow morning. Walking at 7 (Need to do this!) First dog (so far only dog) is not till 10:30

My poor mom! I made the tax appointment for her, she missed the tax appointment, she wouldn't answer the phone yesterday but she called me today.. So did the tax people. They were willing to get her in tomorrow, so I called her back. She says she got an extension and now wants to wait till she gets a hearing aid (she just told me she's having trouble hearing live conversation. She can hear on the phone but not in person) She was going to try Walmart. I told her she might want to go to an audiologist and found a well rated one near her. But she didn't want me to make an appointment. Still says she is not ready for me to go down there.

Wow! got her a tax appointment. She wants to have David's wife drive her rather than a cab. I wish she'd take a cab, but her way. maybe she's afraid she couldn't get a cab home. I am not sure. I'm going to call her an hour before to make sure the ride is arranged. I told her I'd like to finish dogs I have scheduled but I could be there Thursday. I could be there sooner if she needed. She really needs help. At least her voice sounded better today