- I am mundane and magical, Silly and serious. I am an underachiever who suspects that someday in the eternities I may yet blossom and even fruit. I am a collector of spirits and essences, a studier of mood and nuance.I have many many faults and yet I've always been loved. I am a good friend, but I will let you go if you so desire. I believe in Somewhen. I laugh easily and cannot often cry, which I know is a Flaw. Like You, I am a work in progess.
Monday, March 31, 2014
I am really tired. Have only slept a tiny bit for the past three days. Yesterday (was it yesterday?) i was disgusted to find myself leaking tears and of course I wrote that on facebook because I write almost everything there. And to my surprise it had a response that was kind and compassionate, but it was from the person causing me to be sleepless. Now, being tired I should have been silent but was I? No. I basically alluded to hm being the reason for my sleeplessness which I did not explain and which of course when reading it sounds quite snippy which was not my intention but only to say it is dangerous territory (at least for me) and possibly destructive. I don;t BLAME him for my feelings, but if those feelings have not changed in all this time I really don;t see that they will and why come off sounding like a nut job. Worse is the recognition that I probably am a nut job if really only in regard to this situation. so...I am so tired, but I feel like I owe an apology or an explanation which puts me right in the position of talking about it that strikes me as quicksand. I think it may be kinder to seem rude and unappreciative of the overture which I am not, but better leave it seeming that way than try to explain what my POV is. Anyway, the bad feeling may keep me awake still. I don;t now but I sure hope not because I am getting erratic due to lack of sleep