About Me

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I am mundane and magical, Silly and serious. I am an underachiever who suspects that someday in the eternities I may yet blossom and even fruit. I am a collector of spirits and essences, a studier of mood and nuance.I have many many faults and yet I've always been loved. I am a good friend, but I will let you go if you so desire. I believe in Somewhen. I laugh easily and cannot often cry, which I know is a Flaw. Like You, I am a work in progess.

Friday, July 18, 2014

Supposing I will update this page with s little of what's been going on in my life. I ask myself why. I really am not sure, but here I am on the page and typing words.

I took two of my co-workers out to lunch yesterday which I enjoyed a lot. Lorena is a friend and I like Greg a lot. We went to Benjas for Thai food and I had sake which is a very pleasant mellow drink for me. Lorena and Greg share a birthday if not birth year. Both July 16. Today Lorena went sky-diving. her second time. She did a front flip out of the plane. : )

Last night was fairly interesting. I watched 2 documentaries, one about reassessing the role of Neanderthals in our history. I don't even know if PBS is a trustworthy source anymore. If news can lie, if governments and corporations can lie, who can you trust? That's a pretty serious question and I am sure it will crop up a lot in my thoughts. On the Neanderthal doc, I found it interesting that the percentages of Neanderthal DNA found in modern humans is purported to vary by ethnicity. Lowest percentages Africans. Next, Asians and the most Europeans. The doc was saying that some of the Neanderthal DNA in modern humans seemed to be a boost for immune systems. I wondered if part might also relate to aggressive tendencies but then I wondered if my wondering was racist. It was an interesting watch. The second documentary was on tiny houses. I am charmed by them even while wondering if I could adapt to living in one. I had a real dislike of the house my mother still lives in. 3000 square feet. That larger house had a very negative impact on our family life. As a matter of fact, I was always happiest in cabins we stayed in. I think minimizing one's stuff and spending more tie outside might be a very good thing. yes, I would want 'my place" but need it be humongous? No! I was wondering what a community of tiny house folk might be like. Maybe a couple of common structures (ok...I was thinking like a stable and a pool and some sort of meeting rooms) I was thinking gardens and lots of nature. It was pleasant fantasy.

When I went to bed I did not sleep very well. Threw up (normal for me) then slept fitfully. I had my ghosts. but also some strange stuff. One wake up I was in a tizzy about Kim Peek (Rainman- who is dead) I was very emotional wondering about whether he had felt loved. It seemed from the little I know about him that he was. I was wondering what that was all about! At another point I was thinking of a woman I really didn't want to think about much. She was a former employer and I had gone from liking her lots to not so much by the end. I always dreaded seeing her and what I might say. Well wouldn't you know it I went to get Dude's Prozac today (third attempt) and I was dressed in grooming clothes because I had 2 dogs coming very shortly. I was only at the store for the Prozac, in and out, but who do you suppose I met going out the door? Yup! She hugged me. I hugged back. I said, "I was thinking about you last night" She said, "I think about you all the time" I wanted to, but did not, ask what she thought about me. She asked what I was doing, if i was grooming. I said I was (well, it's only a fundraiser, but I didn't say that) and that I am going to school and working for another company. Then I excused myself. It was very weird. I hate situations where perhaps air should be cleared but I don't clear it. But I was glad not to feel hostile. And so strange that i was thinking about her just last night. I don't get her with the ghosts that often. The last wake up was also odd. I had the word "Seabirds" in blue writing on a grey background as an image in my head. What kind of image is that??? I have a strange brain. there was other stuff too but that's more the usual stuff.

I am happy that my fundraiser has picked up a bit. I have done 4 more dogs. One was a 16 year old shh tzu. He was in pretty good shape for his age. not a very pretty dog but very sweet. His owner's old groomer had retired and when I asked her what she wanted done she honestly didn't know. I suggested maybe a quarter inch of hair (he was white with very fine maltese-y hair. His face was already short so I just trimmed it a bit. Lots of eye excretions and I don;t know what I've done with my eye-boogie comb (flea comb but there aren't fleas in my area- the thing is the perfect tool for eye-boogies though) Anyway when she came to get him i could tell she wasn't really pleased. She wanted him shorter. I told her to bring him back after my other dog of the day was gone and i would re-do him. She knew that that was a lot to do but i didn't mind for me, I want people to be happy. But that was a lot of grooming time for an old dog. I completely 10 stripped him, ears, tail head and face included. she said her old groomer shaved his face. Hope that's what she wanted! The other dog that day was the smallest adult corgi I have ever seen. Hee was adorable. At first he was very scared but once he realized i wasn't going to hurt him he seemed to enjoy the process. I really enjoyed him too. He was just a bath but I got a ton of undercoat off him. Today I did my friend Annie's Bichon and her grandmother's cockerpoo. I did maintenance on them but tried to charge her for a bath. She insisted on giving me more. Told her I wouldn't take it so she specified to give it to one of the friends i am fundraising for. Which I did. Annie stayed the whole time. Partly out of curiosity to see how her dogs were done and partly just to spend time with me. I was touched!

One of the friends I am fundraising for just found out her father died July 7th (as if she doesn't have way too much on her plate already) He had been homeless and he'd had throat cancer which she just told me he was clear on. She thinks the radiation got him. Anyway she found out the night before her English final and English terrifies her. This is her last mandatory English class and i was too tired to help her without some rest. Got up late and the night to find texts about her dad. She is a very tenderhearted person. She went to the final but when the professor saw her she was so swollen eyed from crying the professor gave her a 2 week extension for the final . I was so glad. That was compassionate. The other person i am fundraising for does not seem t be getting much better with whatever is making her body fail to make red blood cells. And HER daughter, a CNA single mom just had too have her gallbladder out the other day. My little bit isn't doing a whole lot to help them.

I agreed to trade hours with a co-worker tomorrow so I am working 1-9 (I don't prefer the evening and she knows that. I need to start just saying NO, but my nature is accommodating.Anyway I got a text last night about a cocker spaniel that needs a groom. I asked 3 times if he is under 30 pounds because otherwise I won't be able to lift and maneuver him with my darn hands. she didn't answer but i told her to bring him at 9 tomorrow morning. I guess we will see. But this was probably a mistake to do him and then go work 1-9. Dog grooming is like physical high for me. it relaxes me a lot but i typically just want to sleep afterward. Hope I make it through tomorrow.

The poem that was published is presumably here http://www.vineleavesliteraryjournal.com/issue-11-jul-2014.html I haven't looked through it yet, I like the writing I have read here. I liked my poem better before i made it 'clearer" Oh well, I am still happy someone liked it!

Now I am going to bed! Yes it is early but I am dog tired.

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