- I am mundane and magical, Silly and serious. I am an underachiever who suspects that someday in the eternities I may yet blossom and even fruit. I am a collector of spirits and essences, a studier of mood and nuance.I have many many faults and yet I've always been loved. I am a good friend, but I will let you go if you so desire. I believe in Somewhen. I laugh easily and cannot often cry, which I know is a Flaw. Like You, I am a work in progess.
Saturday, April 5, 2014
Pretty subdued today. Yesterday was a day to review my life. I had material for a poem I was thnking of writing, something along the lines of This Is What it Feels Like and I will say, I tend to write from my darker moments not the lighter ones and spending that time reflecting yesterday has left me actually physically weak today. I don't think i will end up writing the poem. It's impossible to get all the tangents an nuances, but toward the end of the day I had a thought that filled me with awe and amusement. By the time I moved to Salt Lake I was about as dead and detached as a person can be. I had no deep immediate ties. Only the vestiges of family too. I had written off a love relationship years an years ago and I am an introvert who does not approach people, so I figured I had time to read or watch tv or drive from home to work and back until the body finally caught up with the rest of me and died. It was on the way back from work one day when that changed. I did nothing to change it. In the less-than-half-a-football-field distance from my car door to my apartment door I was conversationally approached and ended up spending a good couple hours I reckon talking to a stranger I had barely noticed before. About all kinds of things. And while this was a little scary it was interesting. I never expected it to happen again but he HAD said I will see you around. I thought that was the usual phrase. How surprised was I when he knocked at my door. Now, this was not like a romantic encounter in the usual sense of romance, but really it was much more romantic looking back. He became my friend and we talked and talked and listened an listened and how he would have thought to look at a pretty much dead person or how he to a great degree brought me back to life is worth studying. People who know Miles might or might not laugh when I say that being with him was like being with my best concept of God, it was free, heart opening and fun. And it was deep. And every once in awhile I smile to think he never said goodbye and maybe that means we might run into each other again. Miles could find a person in hell and ask if you were ready to blow that joint.